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You Can Do ANYTHING for 10 Seconds

Over the last few months, I feel I may have fallen victim to negativism. You know what I'm talking about...when you just assume the worst in all situations. I don't know what had changed, but it wasn't in my favorite place to be. A while back, Suzie and I watched a hilarious Netflix original, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt. 

 A brief summary of the show, Kimmy was held captive in a bunker by a religious fanatic that told her of the world apocalypse. It ended up being a fictional tale and she was "rescued" and tossed into "normal" life in New York City. The show focuses on her spunky attitude and her hilarious attempts at figuring out modern life. In one episode, Kimmy is talking about how she over comes hard times. She is working a crank in the corner of the bunker. Others in the bunker tell her to stop and allow someone else a turn. She, in an exhausted voice, says:
“I learned a long time ago that a person can stand just about anything for 10 seconds, then you just start on a new 10 seconds. All you’ve got to do is take it 10 seconds at a time.”

 As crazy as it is, I really liked that attitude. In all reality, we do just about anything for ten seconds. I know, I know, I'm not always the best at counting to ten. Starting today...I will try with a more concentrated effort.

 1...2...3...4...5...6...7...8...9...10...1...2...

 I am also trying to slow down and enjoy the moment. Too often I find myself worrying about the future. Not just the immediate future, but things far down the road!!! I don't know why, but I lay awake for hours at night worrying about everything. It is about what kind of man I am to my wife, what kind of father I am to my kids, how my career is going, the yard work that needs to be done, the house work that needs to be completed, the cats, hoping for a dog, if I left the oven on, did I lock all the doors, did I close the garage...and the list goes on.

 Finally, when sleep comes, it's always too short.

 Being a step-parent is really tough. It's hard to stay positive, keep the kids out of any adult conflict, and most importantly not feel jealous. When Kayden says he would rather be at his father's house, it's hard to not take that personally. It's hard to hear him on the phone with his father. I joke and kid, but in the end, it isn't easy. I never would have thought it would be this difficult to find a place as a step-parent. It isn't like anything else out there. Unless you're a step-parent that sits through the homework, the illness, doctor's appointments, sporting events, the fits, the joys, the screaming, crying, and laughter, it's hard to explain. I know the kids love me and I love them. I guess it's just hard to explain. Maybe one day, I'll find the words to describe life as a step-parent of two kids!

 I am beyond blessed. My wife is an amazing woman. It isn't always the case, but I was able to marry my very best friend. She stuck to my side even when I tried to drift away. She has always been my constant. Being together has been an amazing ride thus far and am so excited to see what the future holds for our family. So to end this whole thing for the day, I'm learning to slow down, calm down, enjoy the moment, and live my life and enjoy the little things. When things get tough, take them ten seconds at a time.

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